Stop comparing yourself!

I took a big break from the blog because I was planning Spring Break with my kids and hubby.  A few weeks leading up to the break I start feeling a little nervous about putting on a swimsuit, yes I really did.  For those of you that have been to Miami before you know the pressure is real!  Most girls and even mother with 6 kids ( ok, I might be exaggerating) look like supermodels! LOL!

Then I asked myself: ” Marianne how do you write a blog about encouraging women and this is how you feel?” .  I really thought about all of my posts and how they are supposed to resonate with me first.  I know that as women we do it all the time.  We spend time comparing our bodies with other women, our parenting skills, our house, our lives, etc…. Wherever we are in our life journey, we should “own it” whatever it is.   Comparing will lead us to miss so much of what we need to be grateful for.   I had to remind myself that being healthy was more important than anything else.   And most of all being able to spend time away with family was an even bigger blessing!   

Thankfully  most of my swimwear is from Helen Jon- a swimwear line designed by women for women.    I promise you I have yet to find a brand that fits this well.   Although the collection looks amazing on everyone sometimes it feels like they’ve conducted a special research on “real women”.  By “real women” I mean those of us who have had a couple of kids and can’t no longer afford to wear unpadded bras or leave their booty cheeks out.   The fabric feels amazing and the looks are timeless. I’ve worn mine for a couple years now and I can’t do without!  I accessorized all my looks with items from local boutique Stitch And Arrow-everything she sells is always so affordable and chic.

  

So what I’m not a size 2? Bring on the supermodel South Beach I’m ready -stretch marks, spider veins, cellulite and all!  I’ll rock a swimsuit well into my 60’s and I will do it with style.  I hope we all get into the habit of appreciating our own beauty.  We can do it girls, we run this.  




XO,

Marianne


PS Here’s a discount code if you in the market for swimwear NEWFRIENDS15 on Helenjon.com and get 10% on www.stitchandarrow.com when you sign up for their newsletter.  You can also shop my options below :)

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Look #1

Orange and pink paisley bikini set option ( my color/print is sold out) options:

 
Bikini top  here


Bikini bottom here



Look #2


Tunic options: here , here and here

Chanel espadrilles  here

Beach bag: here and here


Look #3


Crop top set options: here, here and here



Look #4

Bikini shorts here
Surf shirt here
Bikini top here




Size doesn’t define you.

As we are getting close to Spring and Summer I know that most women are going to be shopping for new clothes.  I find that some women are hard on themselves when it comes to sizing as if it defines them somehow.  The truth is it does not.  You can easily be a size 8 in a particular brand and wear a 10 somewhere else. The only thing that should really matter is how the clothes fit.

I want to share a few advices that I think will help you during your shopping adventures.  For example with jeans be sure to try different sizes and different styles. Chances are you will try several ones and only a few will work.  I would try at least two to three different sizes. With skirts and dresses try to go up in size to leave room for your hips and have the waist taken in. Always make sure the sleeves on jackets or shirts are not too long and that the waist is defined. if you are trying to close that jacket or that shirt and the gap in between the buttons is opening-switch to the next size.

It’s better to size up and get alterations versus wearing super tight clothes to prove to yourself that you are the same size you were 10 years ago, stop already. No one cares, do you!  

I also realize some women wear things too loose. Maybe you have lost weight or you are wearing the wrong size. Try to size down next time and see how it looks. You won’t know until you give it a try. 

Don’t get “caught up” on what size you wear focus on a great fit and look.  Your clothes should not be too tight or too loose because you are so hung up on sizing.  Always pick at least two to three different sizes when you are trying things on.  Pick the items that fits you the best and alter the ones that are very close to a perfect fit with or without the help of a little alteration.

Remember ill fitting clothes will always look cheap regardless of how expensive they are. Alterations can really create a look that feels more custom made and elevated.  

 So size up/down and get over yourself ! I promise it’s not that serious, size is just a number.

XO,

Marianne

PS  You can always reach out if you need help with shopping or styling- info@stylissima.com




Stop blaming the kids!

***If you just had a baby this post is not for you. I’ve been down that road before and I totally get it :)


I always feel so uncomfortable when women randomly come up to me and say:” Oh I remember when I was as fancy as you. Now I have kids so everything has changed!”.     What I’m really thinking the whole time they are talking is :” Why did you stop?”.  I never find the courage to say: ” Girl stop blaming the kids!”.  Your children are not the reason you stopped putting something as easy as lipstick on, ok!  Yes, it’s true our body has changed and we have to get used to things we never had before like spider veins, stretch marks and a new pants sizes.  But that is NOT a reason why we should wear pajama pants everywhere we go. I’ve seen plenty of new mothers pulling their hair in a ponytail and adding a touch of lip gloss  just to feel a little prettier- I really admire them for that.   I just wish I saw more women doing the same. I mean even in the work force I see them showing up and not dressing the part. 

I know that it’s hard for us as women to think about ourselves and our family at the same time.  And I’m not saying every women has to be super duper extra like me sometimes! LOL! ( See picture below). But come ‘on ladies let’s get it together even it means wearing gym clothes everyday ( that’s my real life favorite outfit by the way) or a cute pair of jeans and a cute tee- do somethin’.  The truth is time will go by and pajama pants will become your new normal and they will take you into a deep hole you’ll never be able to get out from.  You’ll become that women who almost has a panic attack every time she has to find something to wear because she’s gotten so used to not caring.  It doesn’t matter if you are a size 2 or a size 16! And it doesn’t matter if you shop at Target or at Neiman Marcus- make it work and make the effort to do something nice for yourself. When we feel good about ourselves we are of much better service to everyone around us. 


My wish is that you will be confident enough one day to get dressed up, take fun pictures and love the women you see in the picture. Just remind yourself of the women you know you are and be proud of how far you have come. Have fun with your pictures and don’t take yourself too seriously. Also please remember not to get caught up in comparing yourself to others but admire your own beauty and be obsessively grateful for your life! 


XO,

Marianne


PS I’m always rooting for you and I’m here if you ever need my help!

White blouse: here, here or here.

Black beret : here and here.

Fashion socks : here and here

Black skirt: here and here

Ankle strap sandals: here and here.

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